This was an enjoyable book, even if I am still a bit baffled by it and can’t figure out if it was a 3 star or a 4 star read. It’s half comedian/actor memoir and half pop sociology in the vein of a Freakanomics or Malcolm Gladwell book. Ansari didn’t want to write just another celebrity memoir and he was fascinated by the new ways technology is influencing society’s love lives, so he teamed up with NYU sociologist Eric Klinenberg. Together they took on a massive research study by interviewing and surveying hundreds of people, visiting four continents, tapping into the power of online research, and consulting with the world’s leading sociologists. Ansari weaves his own personal dating experiences and insights throughout the book in-between presenting the results of their research and telling anecdotes of people they studied.
Honestly, I would never have read this book if it had been a straightforward memoir. The memoir market is saturated and each one I read seems to get more pointless and inane than the last (cough cough, looking at you Poehler). But I was intrigued by the premise of a sociologist and a comedian writing together. The result was fun, but a bit uneven in places. Modern Romance never quite seemed to find its footing because it was (sometimes awkwardly) shifting between the two writers and their unique styles. Still, I have to give them credit for trying something new and fresh. This is definitely unlike any other book I’ve read or am likely to read.
I opted for the audiobook version and didn’t regret it. There are some charts and pictures in the hardback that I obviously couldn’t see in the audio version, but I never felt confused or like I was missing out on anything. Ansari’s animated delivery kept me interested the entire way through. Also, his voice helped ease some of the transitional awkwardness between comedy sections and research sections. Final verdict: read this book, especially if you’re a sociology or Ansari fan, but choose the audiobook version or borrow the hardcopy from the library.
It sounds interesting. I’m probably going to get sociologist envy, because I’d love to be able to call a sociologist and research whatever comes to mind. Or be a sociologist. I’d like that too. But not enough to go back to school.
The writeup on this book in Time magazine was really compelling. Although I’m happily married and hope to never date again (I’m terrible at it) I find the cultural shift towards online dating fascinating. Data point: although I didn’t meet my husband online I dated online before we met ~13 years ago and at that point it was still relatively taboo to do so. Now everybody does it. My one 42 year old single friend spends hours each week pouring over profiles looking for perfection. When he travels he easily finds women abroad who are happy to meet with him for a few dates despite knowing he’s only there for 2 weeks. Everybody is replaceable, why work through problems when you can so easily find somebody new? Will definitely be interested to say what Aziz has to say on the subject.
Actually, that phenomenon is a big part of the book. Decades ago people would just settle down with the nice boy/girl down the street who was nice enough, but now people have so many options they won’t settle down unless they find their perfect soulmate. Very interesting.
I had written this off as yet another comedy memoir that didn’t need to be written, and then I heard a segment on it on This American Life, and it was so interesting! I heard the audio is the best way to read it, but my library only has hard copies.
Does your library allow you to check out from OneClickDigital? It’s a library app where I get a lot of audiobooks from and they have MR, so it might be worth looking into.
Yeah, I love OneClickDigital! But my library hasn’t purchased the rights to this particular audiobook, apparently. I just double-checked. It doesn’t even show up in the search results for me. Sadface.
Oh that’s the worst :-(
I was already planning on reading this during a long drive I have coming up, and now I feel like I have to try and convince the others in the car to listen to the audio-book version with me. I’m sure they’d be interested too! We shall see how it goes.
Ooh! That’d be fun…. as long it’s with friends. This one would be a super awkward family listen LOL.