Like Kool Aid And Boxed Wine (Mixed Together)

So Book Bub is sometimes my friend and sometimes my nemesis.  This time? I have no idea what it is to me.  So I guess I checked off Romance, Mystery and Suspense…and this one has all three in its parenthetical sub title so it would make sense that they would send this selection to me as something I may want to read.  And read it I did.  171 ridiculous pages of something I really didn’t want to put down but I have no idea why because it’s really not that good.  It was like getting drunk on kool aid and boxed wine (mixed together) while hating myself for eating an entire sleeve of sour cream and onion Pringles and whatever those leftovers were in the fridge.  Sometimes it happens, but you don’t always talk about it in public. But I kind of have to talk about this…so here goes.

Debra is engaged to the most perfect man in the world (named Jackson of course).  He’s wealthy, his family is influential, he has a rewarding career and we get told a story about how he took care of Debra when she drunkenly knocked some guy out for getting handsy and then she broke her hand.  So we know that’s he’s a really good guy.  Three years have passed and now the two are engaged about to have the high society dream wedding–until three hours before the big event Debra gets a note delivered from a waiter that says, “I can’t do this, this is a huge mistake” or something to that end.  Jackson then takes off and goes on their honeymoon leaving Debra embarrassed and actually really sad. Things go from awful to who the hell does Jackson think he is, when Debra wakes up in their condo to a process server at the door giving her 6 weeks to vacate.  Turns out Debra isn’t very good with finances (even though that was her job) and she’s fully in debt (because even though Jackson’s family is rich they said she had to pay her half).  She helped pay for the luxury condo that’s only in Jackson’s name and other infuriating details that makes Debra sound unintelligent over trusting (sorry, just my opinion here).  Well Debra doesn’t want to spend her next six weeks on the couch until she has to figure out what to do so instead she decides to see if she can find a house switch place (like air bnb) and regroup.  Ok that’s pretty fun.  There’s a little nod toward the Holiday (where I suspect she got her inspiration) and off she goes to Mallorca to heal herself, but in the process finds herself firmly embedded in a mystery that only SHE and not the POLICE or the POLICE OFFICER FROM ANOTHER COUNTRY WITH WHOM SHE IS HAVING SEX seems to find interesting.  Apparently women leave all their possessions and their passports to go “running off with tycoons” often.  So there was that which caused an eye roll and more than a bit of annoyance.  And there were so many other things too (good and bad) but I decided I wanted to make a list of stuff today. So here’s my list:

Here’s what I liked:

Debra’s character said and did funny things. She reminded me of a Stephanie Plum type character–kind of bumbling but full of heart.  And so I liked her and I wanted good things to happen for her.

Debra’s character has sex with someone and she doesn’t beat herself up about it (I hate books where this is not the case).  She enjoys it, uses protection, and all the adults win in the situation.

Probably other things but I can’t really remember anything and yet I read it like I had never read anything so good in my life (truth is, I have, but I was in the zone).

Here’s what I didn’t like:

Develop her love interest more so that we too could fall in love with Doyle…he was pretty cool but there’s a pretty big fact that his beautiful wife died the year prior and that he was “sad”  (I kid you not). No, develop that or leave it out. He didn’t really seem emotionally unavailable to me, he seemed fine…nice…and a bit naive.

Debra’s character does dumb things–like confronting a would be killer with no weapon/doesn’t tell Doyle who IS a police officer (just not in Mallorca).  I mean if you’re sleeping with him and it was one of his roommates who went missing…you might want to run that theory by him.  But that’s just me obviously, because Debra did not think this was a good idea.

She never really seemed to do anything except go out drinking like 3 times while she’s there (and she nearly always pukes but that’s a different story I supposed).  Listen, see my above comment, I love to drink…but I think I would also go swimming in the crystal clear water, explore stuff, and do things. She really does none of that.

We don’t know why Jackson called off the wedding. He even comes back into the story and we still don’t get that.

And other stuff that would spoil things but you would literally scratch your head and say, “Wait, WHAT?” and I would be like, “I KNOW!” and you’d roll your eyes and I’d laugh…because we’re friends like that, and I might’ve just served you kool-aid and wine (mixed together).