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Rules for The Bollywood Bride drinking game

February 26, 2016 by scootsa1000 12 Comments

Drink every time Ria’s aunties do something charming. Think about how you wish there was more about this lovely group of ladies in the book. Wouldn’t it be nice to find out how their friendships came to be?

Drink whenever Jen and Nikhil are front and center in the story. Its their wedding. I’d like to know more about Jen. I know she’s a doctor and she’s uncomfortable in a sari. But what else makes her tick?

Drink whenever the book actually alludes to Bollywood and how that business works. Bollywood produces hundred of films every year and creates mega-stars, the likes of which I’m not sure we can fully understand. Like Brangelina x 100.

Drink whenever Ria’s aunt and uncle show how lovely they are. Their love for the three main children in this book is pretty spectacular, and I adored when the uncle told the story about meeting the aunt. I’d read a whole book about them and the auntie squad.

Drink whenever Ria’s hometown of Mumbai is actually described in any way whatsoever.

Drink each time Vikram’s mom does something that seems human.

Drink when the actual details of the wedding are described. It sounded gorgeous. I wish we got more of that instead of sex in a supply closet.

Drink every time important topics like mental health and adoption are discussed openly and frankly.

Drink whenever it is inferred that Ria is a great artist and yet then we don’t hear about it again for another 100 pages.

What’s that? Not drunk yet? I guess those things didn’t happen very often. How about with these rules:

Take a sip anytime someone exercises improperly.

Take a  sip whenever Vikram gets so unbelievably angry you wonder why he isn’t taking anger management classes.

Take a sip whenever Ria has the opportunity to tell Vikram something resembling the truth about how she feels, but pulls a Lady Edith and decides to keep her mouth shut.

Take a sip every time Vikram seductively (?) breathes on Ria’s lips.

Take two drops every time Ria says “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Take a drop when each and every opportunity they have for this entire mess to be cleared up is wasted.

Now call an ambulance and get your stomach pumped. You probably have alcohol poisoning.

Filed Under: Book Club, Fiction, Romance Tagged With: Bollywood Bride, CBR8, Scootsa1000, sonali dev, the bollywood bride

About scootsa1000

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CBR11 is my 9th Cannonball. Holy moly. View scootsa1000's reviews»

Comments

  1. Malin says

    February 26, 2016 at 12:54 pm

    This was a hilarious and wonderful way to review this book. It’s a shame it’s such a frustrating book, but I hope that means we can have an even better discussion in the Book Club about it.

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    • Scootsa1000 says

      February 26, 2016 at 1:08 pm

      I’m not sure I’ve ever felt so badly about not liking a book. Sonali Dev seems like such an intelligent and lovely woman, and i really wanted to like it. Can’t wait for next week’s discussion!

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  2. faintingviolet says

    February 26, 2016 at 1:28 pm

    This is superb, and I may pilfer from it for the discussion. :)

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    • Scootsa1000 says

      February 26, 2016 at 3:32 pm

      Pilfer away!

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  3. narfna says

    February 26, 2016 at 1:37 pm

    Love it. This looks to be a promising book club discussion.

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  4. ellepkay says

    February 26, 2016 at 1:49 pm

    This is such a beautiful (and hilarious) round up of the weaknesses of this book. I’m not sure I’m going to finish it. At 40% I feel like I understand it, but every review seems to indicate that the remaining 60% will be more of the same. :(

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    • Malin says

      February 26, 2016 at 1:51 pm

      The second half of the book really is a LOT better. You may want to keep going just to get to the better part of the story. If you only read the first half, that’s where all the biggest problems are. The only redeeming parts of the book are int he second half.

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      • Ellepkay says

        February 26, 2016 at 2:22 pm

        *Sigh* I feel like I am owed something decent after getting this far, so maybe I’ll keep slogging. But I feel like a petulant child whining “I don’t waaaaaaant tooooo!”. I’ll only finish it so I can discuss properly with all of you.

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        • Scootsa1000 says

          February 26, 2016 at 3:34 pm

          I agree that the second half is much improved over the first monotonous, repetitive, frustrating half. Once they go shopping for the men’s wedding suits things start to move along.

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        • Malin says

          February 27, 2016 at 6:08 am

          I’m glad I stubbornly kept going because at least then I got some good stuff out of it.

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  5. MsWas Sawsm says

    February 27, 2016 at 5:56 am

    Brilliant!

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  6. alwaysanswerb says

    February 27, 2016 at 2:01 pm

    HAHAHA I love this review. Well played.

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