Odd Thomas is aiming to be Pithy Thomas — and failing

Oh, Dean Koontz. I might be just about at the end of my rope with you…

“Every failure hollows out my heart a little further, and no success is able to refill any of that emptiness.”

Okay, so this is the fifth Odd Thomas book. Up to now, besides the first one which was pretty good, they’ve been a little disappointing — particularly in terms of plot. Still, Odd’s own little way of viewing the world keeps the books moving and keeps me (vaguely) interested. But with Odd Apocalypse, the plot was actually pretty interesting. Odd and his weirdo ever-preggers girlfriend have found themselves on this enormous estate — and estate with a secret! Some wild shit happens, there’s a freaky little kid and some actual freaks, and of course no one ever says what they mean. But it’s still intriguing enough to keep you going.

My problem with this book was Odd himself. Koontz tries to write this guy as so witty and gives him so many little sayings and observations on the world and it’s like, ENOUGH ALREADY. WE GET IT. Odd has some deep, deep thoughts — he doesn’t need to share them with us every 5 seconds.

“I didn’t have a cell phone because I never needed to play video games or surf the Net, or exchange nude photos with a congressman.”

“Even with the intention to be quiet, human beings seldom can restrain from comment or at least grumbled cursing; we are the chattering species, as much as we are anything else.”

“The dead can be even more frustrating to deal with than are many of the living, which is astonishing when you consider it’s the living who run the Department of Motor Vehicles.”

Any one of these little comments would be fine on its own, but when they come page after page, they start to get pretty freaking annoying. I mean, at one point, he rhapsodizes about how your body is like the wrapp of a Mr. Goodbar. Please stop, and get on with chasing freaks, okay?

Of course, I still put the 6th novel on hold at the library because I am nothing if not a complete-ist.